I snore now. For a while i was in denial. I remember one of the first times someone told me this was my dear friend Stephanie when we got together in Indy. I think this was 6 years ago...maybe 5. In the morning she said "Jules, you snore now". Stef and I had slept in the same room or same apt for 5 or 6 years of lives together. I couldn't believe it. WHY was I snoring. Then Rob would tell me i was snoring and I truly believed it was my allergies. For me, snoring is a repulsive horrible thing a 55 year old fat man would do. Not me. So anyway, my real point is that when I do snore, which I believe is ONLY when I am on my back (I must think this b/c otherwise further embarrassment), Rob will lightly shake the bed to get me to stop. Lately, this is not only getting me to stop snoring, it WAKES ME UP FOR THE DURATION. Now I know it's not his fault b/c he wants to sleep to and I am clearly getting in the way of that. But at the time, I am just furious. Plus I add in the irritation of the REASON I am on my back is b/c my arthritis is so bad in the hips that I can't sleep on my sides anymore. I know, poor me - bad hips, middle aged snoring. Sick of it.
But while I am on it, let me also add a few more ailments that I believe are age related. Lately - zits on my chest. WHAT? Why? I don't even have a chest. It's ridiculous. My memory - it's not JUST that I don't remember things, but I can't explain things...like loss of words. One day this week I signed "Julie" to things all day. WHAT??? As a kid I was called Julie but my family always called me Julia and most other have called me Julia since the mid 80's so what's up with that. Then I tried my hardest to explain that thing when you take money out of your paycheck each month to build up a medical expense fund - see I can't even think of it now. And lastly, the peeing. If I have to pee, it's not a feeling, it's actually pee leaving my body. If I walk even close to the bathroom, I have to pee like I have held it for years. When peter is going potty, I nearly rip him off that toilet so I can pee even though moments before we were in that room, I didn't have to go at all.
So -
I snore
I am sore
I have newly appointed acne
I can't think or remember clearly
And I start peeing before I am fulling even sitting on the toilet.
Well - I will say this. I am getting a guard for my teeth b/c of my TMJ and maybe that will help the snoring. Otherwise, i want my own room. I know I am in the running to inherit the worst arthritis so that's just a sad reality. The acne - who knows and really, who cares. The mind- it's going, I know it's going, I have a long history of brains going so really this is Rob's problem, and the peeing - well, if I pee my pants that's not he worst thing that could happen today.
1 comment:
Grandmother snored like a drunken sailor! and doesn't your mom? I think I've heard mom at one point. So at least you are in good company.
Zits? try surprise hair growing there like you are a pre-teen boy! horrible! then the realization that shaving it isn't the best idea (after a misshap with the razor nicking the nipple) plucking is the best option but still - hair! please! Again, me thinks you aren't alone here, just the only one with enough balls to talk about it!!!!
;-}
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